There Goes the Bride

by Ray Cooney & John Chapman
21 May - 3 July 2004
 
 
It is common knowledge that the most wonderful occasion in a woman’s life is her wedding day. But when the father of the bride, an advertising executive who is suffering from stress and absentmindedness, is unable to tear himself away from his latest advertising campaign and in addition suffers an accident which has unforeseen consequences, then the festivities can easily develop into a farce.

It is eleven o’clock in the morning at the Westerby’s home where last?minute preparations are in progress. In a few hours Judy, the only daughter, will marry Australian millionaire’s son, Nicholas Babcock, before 400 invited guests. As both mother and daughter are highly organised, everything, with the exception of a girdle and a sock problem with the grandparents, is running smoothly until the father of the bride arrives late from the florist. Timothy Westerby manages an advertising firm together with his partner Bill Shorter. While Timothy is involved day and night, Bill’s contribution consists mainly of exhibiting his charm. In Timothy’s overstressed condition numerous sedatives and stimulants fight in vain to create some sort of balance.

It was at the florist’s shop that he got the brain wave for his next advertising campaign for Perkins Bras, which he intends to promote by using a model with a “twenties look” ? a so?called “Flapper Girl”. Enterprising as always, he has already procured a life?size cut-out ? albeit headless in order to illustrate his idea to his business partner, Bill. However, as both men whirl around the room dancing the Charleston, Timothy accidently strikes his head on a door. After a brief period of unconsciousness he awakens to find himself staring into the eyes of a ravishing young lady. To his astonishment she is dressed as a Flapper Girl and embodies entirely his concept for the advertising campaign although he has no recollection of when she entered the room. When he questions Bill in an undertone about her, Bill maintains that he is unable to see her and soon each believes the other to be pulling his leg. It is only after the arrival of Dr. Gerald Drimmond, Timothy’s father in law, who shows no reaction that it dawns on Timothy that he alone can see the girl whom he calls Polly Perkins.

He is convinced Polly is an hallucination until she gives him the best kiss of his life causing first his knees to give way and then his wits. Polly soon has him completely under her spell; she is lively, naive and shows her unreserved adoration in short she is the embodiment of the male midlife crisis dream. Unfortunately the new girlfriend has chosen the most unfavourable moment for her appearance and despite her invisibility she sets in motion a series of complications. As the Westerbys fail to leave for the Church, numerous, increasingly abstruse reasons have to be invented to prevent the choleric father of the groom from leaving. The bride is already in tears as Timothy hits his head a second time. Whoever thinks that Polly will now disappear into thin air is badly mistaken there is worse to come …